she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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