Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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