Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize