i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize