Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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