whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
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