How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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