hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
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