I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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