Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Randomize