I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
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I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
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I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I wear drunk well.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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