Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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