I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Randomize