is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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