You're my little dorito
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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