Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Jerry, you need to find god
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize