all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
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do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
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I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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