She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
worst night to have a conscience
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize