I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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