they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
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I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
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well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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