I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
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curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
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I think the camel was justified in biting me.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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