Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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