I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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