bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I just googled if crying burns calories
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize