cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize