I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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