My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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