I am puke
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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