Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
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