I just made out with a guy for $7.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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