i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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