Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  I think I just saw someone hide a body.

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  (917): I think I just saw someone hide a body. http://tfl.nu/2aay
  Replies (13) Good night (1502) Bad night (2647) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.

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  (518): after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date. http://tfl.nu/xryi
  Replies (43) Good night (8089) Bad night (583) Order T-Shirt
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I think I sharted a yagerbomb.

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  (502): I think I sharted a yagerbomb. http://tfl.nu/xi3d
  Replies (15) Good night (589) Bad night (3499) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.

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  (651): You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping. http://tfl.nu/k03m
  Replies (12) Good night (672) Bad night (7105) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??

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  (919): Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ?? http://tfl.nu/0nsh
  Replies (54) Good night (1153) Bad night (4472) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water

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  (203): Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water http://tfl.nu/s84f
  Replies (24) Good night (6714) Bad night (846) Order T-Shirt
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  (585): View more from New York

  at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.

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  (585): at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter. http://tfl.nu/syxr
  Replies (4) Good night (995) Bad night (2343) Order T-Shirt
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.

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  (706): I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face. http://tfl.nu/e8qy
  Replies (83) Good night (17339) Bad night (1787) Order T-Shirt
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  (289): View more from Ontario

  The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.

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  (289): The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight. http://tfl.nu/z22w
  Replies (5) Good night (6798) Bad night (816)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.

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  (218): I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot. http://tfl.nu/z5np
  Replies (4) Good night (881) Bad night (2809) Order T-Shirt
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  (281): View more from Texas

  and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.

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  (281): and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst. http://tfl.nu/n2zz
  Replies (6) Good night (2807) Bad night (756) Order T-Shirt
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  (469): View more from Texas

  I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.

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  (469): I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part. http://tfl.nu/bfoq
  Replies (8) Good night (647) Bad night (2631) Order T-Shirt
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  (909): View more from California

  I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.

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  (909): I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats. http://tfl.nu/jzu3
  Replies (10) Good night (645) Bad night (1052) Order T-Shirt
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU

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  (810): its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU http://tfl.nu/okh4
  Replies (6) Good night (560) Bad night (1015) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood

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  (612): Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood http://tfl.nu/1at9
  Replies (5) Good night (1104) Bad night (607) Order T-Shirt

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