You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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