well I can't set my house on fire every night
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize