its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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