Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize