**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
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I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
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Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize