WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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