hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Fuck me I smell like cheese
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize