He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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