ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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