respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Everclear isn't food dammit
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize