Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
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