Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize