this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Randomize