There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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