I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize