Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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