I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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