i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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